Sometimes I Fail

Recently I had an unpleasant encounter with someone I care a great deal about.  I also believe we were on our way to becoming good friends and I hope that can still happen.

What was my failure?  I allowed myself to react to an incident in a negative way when I also at the time was stressed by multiple other outside influences and was very tired.  In other words, I overreacted.

It was less the words and more the delivery.  Being a big guy with a rather intense look is perceived as intimidating by some.  It doesn't matter if that is what I meant to do, it was still the result.  My sister is the one that reminded me when I was telling her about the incident that my size and overall persona can be very intimidating without doing anything.

So, I can’t do anything about being me, but I need to temper my words and emotions when I am upset.  Buddha taught that a single well placed word is more powerful than a thousand for either good or ill.  He also taught in multiple writings about the power of generosity and kind words.  It doesn't matter that I did not intend to hurt this friend.  What matters is that I did.  Not very “Be Like Buddha.”

For this I can only seek his forgiveness and strive to be more aware of my impact on others.

Namaste

“Teach this triple truth to all: A generous heart, kind speech, and a life of service and compassion are the things which renew humanity.” - Buddha